Always the Last to Bed

Remember in high school when we used to hang out in the parking lot after school (or during school if you were bad and skipping class), and the lot was the place to be. You didn’t even know who was going to be at the lot, but you headed there anyway to find out. Well now that we’re older and do adult sh*t, we need the Mom Lot. The coolest spot for Moms! The place to go while we’re out running errands and can’t run home quickly but need to stop for a few minutes…or an hour of bliss!

Hear me out…a special parking lot JUST FOR US where we can park and do whatever we want and take a quick break while we’re driving around. It would be a safe place to stop for a few minutes while we snap our BFF, return a phone call (yes we call people!), scarf down a Chik Fil A sandwich in peace, have a friggin cigarette by ourselves, or GASP – TAKE A MINI NAP!!!

There would be a fence around the lot so people can’t see in, and there’s a guard shack as you enter, with a guard that checks your “Mom Credentials” and also acts as security. If you drive a mini van, you’re automatically exempt and get right in. But otherwise, you either have to have kids in your backseat, a photo of said kids, or a witness in the car that can vouch for you.

When you enter The Mom Lot, the guard doesn’t ask you what you’re there for- she/he doesn’t care. Whatever happens in the Mom Lot stays in the Mom Lot. Moms can feel free to eat a snack (you could even grub hub there) or bring your own TBell, Piada, or smoothie, feed your kid, have your kid use the potty (are you the type that drives around with a portable potty chair???), jam out to music for a few minutes, address the envelopes you have to mail without worrying about some a-hole criminal trying to carjack you, cry about whatever we’re sad about today or simply relax in silence with your seat reclined listening to Thievery Corporation, Lorde, or whatever floats your boat.

No tailgating though, and the lot closes at midnight. One hour max parking time. No meet ups either. This lot is for alone time. For Mom sanity. We don’t need a White Claw Convention or Swiftie Dance Party in the Mom Lot.

Each parking spot would be separated from the others, trees, flowers and topiaries planted around the lot for ambiance, and maybe some soothing murals, like ocean waves or pictures of Timothee Chalamet, Ryan Gosling, and Jung Kook.

If we wanted to get real fancy there could be Club levels for the Mom Lot (Moms like to feel exclusive)…I’m too lazy to think of all the levels and what they’d do for you right now, but it’s a stellar idea. I’ll keep thinking about that.

How did I come up with this crazy idea?? There’s been times that I stop at a drive thru quickly while running errands or Christmas shopping and I wish I could pull over and eat in my car without thinking everyone is staring at me, times when my kids were tiny, when I’d try to breastfeed them in a parking lot and felt vulnerable, times when I had an upsetting phone call while I’m driving and just wanted to sit someplace and cry. And there’s been times I’ve been so tired after running around that a 20 min Power Nap or quiet time would have really been a blessing.

The Mom Lot can be a place for all these relaxation moments and more! There’s no judging in the Mom Lot! Think of it as your own personal driveway- but conveniently located near your shopping areas. How many times do you just sit in your driveway when you return home, resisting opening the door, letting everyone know you’re home?? Because as we all know, alone time in the car is precious. Because when we get home, it’s on like Donkey Kong- everyone needs something.

I have a lot of friends who don’t have kids and I don’t want to leave them out. They deserve a safe relaxing space too and are just as stressed as Moms. Maybe they could bring a pic of a kid on the internet (or my kids) and get into the Mom Lot. Or a pic of their fur baby would work too. We all Mother in one way or another! Everyone needs a break now and then in the Mom Lot!